Men of Our Word

Matthew 5:37 “Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”

As a salesperson, I have tried to convince thousands of business owners to buy everything from water (I sold Alhambra door-to-door), to paper (coupons door-to-door), to air (radio ads).  I learned early on that there are 2 kinds of business owners  I really like – those that say “yes” and those that say “no.”  The problem is the vast majority of people fall into an uncommitted, gray zone.  I can’t work with uncommitted responses because unsigned contracts don’t hold up in court!

Last week, the manager at Elliott’s Natural Foods actually called me back and left a message saying that the owner is reviewing my information and that he will contact me if he is interested.  I was shocked when I was listening to the message because earlier in the day she promised she would call me with an update.  I couldn’t believe she took the time to make good on her promise – that is very rare. 

Jesus teaches us in Matthew 5:37 to commit to our words.  Words have value so we need to be careful not to throw them around and make promises we don’t intend to keep.

I think most people won’t commit to giving a truthful answer because in our culture rejection is viewed as offensive.  People would rather make empty promises (sin) and lie (sin) instead of offering a truthful rejection.  We have all experienced this.  When you invite someone to Veritas, what is the normal response?  You, like me, probably get someone who gives you a big, heartfelt smile and then they utter something like, “that sounds nice, we’ll have to make that happen.”  Behind their smile they are really saying, “No, no, no, please God, no.”  Wouldn’t it be more respectful if someone would say “thanks for the offer, but that’s just not for me”? 

I can work with a “no” or “yes” response, but not with an intentionally doctored-up, uncommitted response.  The worst responses are the flat out lies.  There are certain business owners that set and later confirm appointments with me and habitually don’t show up (at their own place of business).  The worst time this happened was when I signed an account in LA.  It was our company’s largest account and my boss wanted to welcome them face-to-face so she flew from Portland to LA for a confirmed meeting with the owners.  She had to leave a packet of information at the doorstep of the business because the owner and manager were both MIA.  Both had committed to being there but ended up being “no-shows” as we call them.  Thankfully, my boss had other meetings in LA or else it would have been an even uglier experience.

I know it is difficult to offer rejection (because we want to please people), so I think the answer is found in both truth and grace.  The person extending the offer needs to be gracious enough to receive rejection, and the person receiving the offer needs to be loving enough to give a truthful answer whether it be rejection or acceptance.  So no more gray, uncommitted, squirrelly answers.  Let your “yes” be your “yes” and your “no” be your “no,” because anything beyond that comes from our adversary, the devil.